Unknown side
by XxMEOWxMeWxX
Summary: Is Mikan really who we think she is? The well known actress, Mikan Sakura, is going to Alice Academy in disguise with her friend and manager Hotaru Imai. There she meets a certain famous playboy which turns out to be her roommate. The fan girls are furi
1. Back to hell

**Unknown side**

**Summary: **The well known actress, Mikan Sakura, is going to Alice Academy in disguise with her friend and manager Hotaru Imai. There she meets a certain famous playboy which turns out to be her roommate. The fan girls are furious and decided to do a little trap… but even the simplest plans can go wrong… Also is Mikan Sakura really the happy go lucky girl we know?

_--------------------_

_By XxMEOWxMeWxX_

_-----------------_

_Writers' block for OD and torn away, sorry!_

_Disclaimer: I'm only going to say this once: I DON"T OWN GAKUEN ALICE! You should know better then to read this!_

_HehEh (jk)_

_One- Back to Hell_

The moonlight shone through the window… a full moon today. Why am I always alone? There's no one to turn to when I'm crushed, no one to sees the darkness that engulfs my life. I'm I that good of an actress that no one can see? Or is it that no one every wonders about the happy go lucky star that always smiles.

_No one cares…_

No, someone will… someday. If I break no one will suffer other then me, the people that surrounds me will all go away. No one wants a useless human, they're junk.

If I pretend no one will ever know. All they can do is to look at me with pity in their eyes and say they understand but no one will. All I can do is wait for now, they say to live is to fight.

Wait…

How long I don't know, maybe there wouldn't be someone. Is there anyone that can lead me to light? I start to doubt that.

A tear escaped… _why? _

_----A M O N G--- T H E--- D A R K N E S S----_

"Hey baka, wake up we're going to be late."

"Just a minute Hotaru," I replied even though I was wide awake long ago. She'll probably hit me with her baka gun in 3… 2… 1

_BAKA BAKA BAKA_

"OUCH, Hotaru!! That hurt," I whined. Today I really didn't want to put up with my fake life anymore… but I've got no choice or else I'll break…

…into a million pieces that can never be mended; pieces of sorrow, despair, sadness, loneliness, and grief. Afraid that me eyes will never see color again.

"Have you forgotten baka? Today we're going undercover and transferring into the Alice Academy again. We went there for kindergarten and grade one and after that you became an actress so they let us out for 10 years."

"How can I forget? I can't wait to see Anna and the others again!"

Hotaru pointed the stupid toy to me (aka Baka gun).

"BUT you're still shooting movies and acting so you don't lose your fame," she said with dollar signs in her eyes.

Is money more important to you then me? I wanted to ask.

Alice Academy, we're returning already? To me, the real me, Alice Academy was hell. In the two years that we were there, most of the students ganged up on me because I never used my alice. They think that they were better then me. Telling the teacher was no use because he was never there or he didn't care.

The name 'Alice' I despise the most. My eyes narrowed. Alice is a perfect, flawless, beautiful angel-like girl. Pure to the core with white wings; she was almost like Kami-sama on earth.

Too pure and perfect.

"Baka, hurry up and get dressed. Because you're late we'll have to eat breakfast in the limo," Hotaru told me. But she was wrong, she was the one that woke up late and she was the one that blamed me for it.

"Gomen Hotaru-chan."

Sadness flooded me. Is Hotaru even my friend at all?

----A L I C E---- A C A D E M Y----

"Mikan, we're here," the raven haired girl told me. Of course I already knew that since I'm not blind, but the character that I was in probably is so…

"Really? Already? I guess I'm really slow. Hehe," I replied.

"Baka."

We got out of the limo and headed for the large gate. The most hateful thing to many students.

"Who're you?" asked the guard.

_BAKA BAKA_

I turned to see Hotaru with her baka gun.

"Pay more attention to your work. There are suppose to be new arrivals coming back from a ten year contract," Hotaru told the guard.

"But they're (GASP) SORRY MS IMAI AND MS SAKURA FOR THE DELAY!" and with lightning speed, he rushed into a building and took out the keys. Behind him was a blond man wearing woman's' clothing.

"Welcome back my students," he said and smiled.

I ran and hugged him but what I really wanted to do was punch his ugly gay face with all the strength I got.

"Hello Narumi sensei," said a emotionless voice.

_--------------_

_--- N E X_ _T_ --- _T I M E---_

_------------_

_Chapter two: Accident_

"_WHAT? She gets my precious?"_

"_We got to teach her a lesson!"_

"_SCREECH… BUMP"_

"_Th- this wasn't suppose to happen!"_

_-------------------------------------------------------------------------_

Author's comments(?)

Hiya people I'm back. This idea came up to me some time ago but I promise you that it'll be good. Getting writers' block for OD and Torn away so if you have any ideas just comment! I'm REALLY REALLY stuck on Opposite Dreams so suggestions would be HIGHLY approved. As for Torn away, I wrote the chapter down but I was deleted T-T

_**Leave a review?**_


	2. Accident

**Unknown side**

_--------------------_

_By XxMEOWxMeWxX_

_-----------------_

_Thanks for the reviews--_

_mYkeecHan, Sakura-chan0610, Shar17, lysabelle, stooopidblackkitty13, Natsume18, Sie-sama, Leenstarz, and forsaken_

_\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\_

_To:: Crimson—Who are you? And it's sorta obvious that your real name is Aaron ;_

_And I only have one brother that's still a toddler_

_Sorry for the late update, everything will be update faster by July since school will be over by then D finally…_

_By the way, it's always Mikan's POV unless it says that it's someone else's POV_

_**Two: Accident**_

It was a moonless night; even the moon has a time when it's engulfed in complete darkness. But my life isn't like the moon…

It's an hour past curfew, boy did they have stupid rules now. It turns out that because of the overpopulation of Alice users everyone had to share a room or something. Tonight they're still moving things in so I and Hotaru were supposed to sleep in the attic.

SUPPOSED is the key word. I don't think such a bubbly, happy, lucky, and careless girl like the one that I'm pretending to be ever existed… maybe Alice, the stupid pure shit.

Unwillingly I'm sinking deeper into the darkness of my own heart. No matter how I try to look at the positive side, no matter how I try to climb up, no matter how I try to find the light I keep on falling. But I can't give in yet…

"Dummy, what are you doing up at this time?" asked a raven haired girl.

"Morning Hotaru, I guess I was exited about our new class…" I replied. There's nothing gained if I pretend to be asleep anyway. I got some things done at least.

"Something troubling you?" A question I never thought I'd hear.

"…Cuz if you're down it makes you look uglier and your fans will loose interest in you."

I put on a fake smile. "Thanks Hotaru!" in a stupid bubbly voice.

---A M O N G T H E A L O N E---

"…We have two new students!" exclaimed a gay blond teacher. Hotaru and I walked in.

"Ohayo minna san, I'm Mikan Sakura!"

"…Hotaru Imai…"

"They're going to be in our class for a year or so because they're fam-"

_BAKA BAKA BAKA_

It looks like Narumi-sensei was suppose to keep his mouth shut but that'll never happen unless someone persuade him. By persuading I mean either threading him or by blackmailing him. Hotaru's done both.

"Well anyways," the gay teacher continued, ignoring the horrified stares of some students. "They'll be with us for only a short time. Next year Mikan and Hotaru has to transfer to another school."

"Well, who wants to be their partners?" asked the teacher.

No hands shot up… a cricket chirped… a ball of hay rolled across the classroom.

"No one? We'll I'll have to pick," the teacher's eyes lit up. "How about Hotaru with Ruka and Mikan with…

"…NATSUME."

A bunch of girls shot up from the seats.

"WHAT? She gets my precious?" said a girl with seaweed colored hair.

"No fair!"

"She gets my darling! This isn't real!'

And so on... These days it's been hard to stay in character. Every time I think about it I'm just bored. Bored of pretending, bored of searching, bored with…

_/////Living/////_

Lost in my thoughts, I didn't notice, for once, that the girls that were complaining crowded around, their eyes filled with rage.

"No fair! They get Natsume and Ruka and… It's just not fair!"

"They don't deserve them! The Natsume/Ruka fan club deserves them WAY better!"

"What till I get my hands on then."

"Stop complaining!" interrupted the seaweed hair girl. "This arguing will get us nowhere."

"Then how can we get somewhere?"

Sumire grinned a little. "I was wondering when someone will ask. We got to teach her a lesson; a lesson not to fool with Natsume/Ruka fan club."

"_Her_? Only one?"

"I don't know bout you guys but that short haired girl's hard to fool. The other one looks like an easy target," said Permy.

"This is what we'll do…"

_Alone in the darkness,_

_Feelings go numb._

_Surrounded in loneliness, _

_No time to be dumb._

_One false move,_

_And down you go._

_Into the shadows,_

_Deep, down below._

"Huh?" There was a pink, neat letter inside my desk. It's been two weeks since I got here and acting wasn't as easy as before but I managed to act. My partner, Natsume, is so arrogant, cold, and the same as everyone else. He may be a genius but he couldn't see through my mask. He barely has time for me, always playing around with girls or disappearing off somewhere. A bad roommate too since he's always bring girls to our dorm and in the end I always get to sleep outside.

I want to fight back but I can't. Then he'll see my true self. I'm such a coward, such a bitch but as long as I still believe that I'll be saved, I can handle it.

Now back to the letter…

_To Mikan_

_I'm going to let you see my latest invention and tell me what you think of it but DON'T touch or else… _

_If you break it you owe me 50,000 rabbits and each day there's a 10 percent interest. Meet me outside the Northern Woods, the place that faces the main road out of AA at 8 p.m. tonight. Don't be late or get lost dummy_

_-Hotaru_

I sighed. Here was no way that Hotaru was EVER going to show me her inventions before they come out or ANY way that she wants my opinion. The fan clubs are so stupid. But for them not to know… I sighed again. I'll have to go.

Sometimes I just hate life.

_So far I have a flicker,_

_A flicker of hope._

_That I won't be sicker,_

_That I'll become clean._

_But every time, everyday,_

_I'm dieing inside._

_Very soon I may,_

_Loose my fight._

_Darkness engulfing,_

_Loosing my way._

_My very being,_

_Kills me each day._

Since it was winter, the sun already set by 8 pm. I wore my silver jacket with white fur on the edges, a mini skirt made of goat wool, white boots, black stockings, a white scarf and a white fluffy hair scrunchy(sp?).

The snow piled on the floor and the trees looked like it had white leaves. A gentle breeze blew and the bushes rustled even after the breeze.

As I suspected, it was a trap but the thing was I didn't know how big the trap was. Now I know… four girls surrounded me and I detected traces of holes under some plants. A net hang on a thick branch of an evergreen tree and there was that Perm girl laughing in the background. Great… this was just my day.

"Ho ho ho ho ho," laughed Permy. "Now you're trapped, there's no escape."

"What'd you want," I snapped, losing my patience with these girls.

"You'll pay for getting close to Natsume," then a flower background appeared. "The Natsume/Ruka fan club is the one for our PRECIOUS!"

"Let me tell you Sakura, you got too close to Natsume and now you'll have to pay for it as well, you have to pay for our humiliation when your inventor friend embarrassed us in front of the whole class."

Wow, they really thought I was that dumb? First: Hotaru never actually embarrassed the fan club… ok maybe except that time when she sold embarrassing pictures of some members of the fan club… and pointed out their faults. And second how was I close to the famous Natsume Hyuuga?

Then, as if on cue, the girls jumped on me. Good thing I had a lot of practice dodging fans. I also have great timing so I predicted what and when they tried to jump on me.

"Sakura, you can't dodge them all!" and the Perm girl started laughing hysterically with stars in her eyes.

Then after a few minutes, a pair of hands pushed me; there wasn't enough time to react that time.

A pair of lights came and headed straight for me after I feel onto the road and everything went dark…

Normal POV

Without thinking, Sumire used her alice (after the hysterical laugh) and with lightning speed pushed the Mikan.

Then two bobbing lights came out of nowhere in the white world.

SCREECH…BUMP

Blood… it was everywhere. Pools full of the red liquid darkened the white snow.

Then a shaky voice of Sumire's interrupted the silence. "Th-this wasn't suppose to happen!" she wailed and collapsed on the floor.

"What were you thinking of?!" a voice came from the shadows. There stood three figures.

End POV

_All is lost. Maybe there wasn't ever supposed to be a savior, a light for this hopeless orphan. I was always alone, always hiding from the truth that I wasn't ever supposed to be saved but now… it's over. Living in a world full of darkness, full of lies and hatred… a world where everyone is cursed with death. What's the point of living in lies anymore? My last hope… shattered into a billion pieces that can never recover… _

_--------------_

_--- N E X_ _T_ --- _T I M E---_

_------------_

_Chapter three: Change_

"_Are you ok?"_

"_You disgust me. Who're you suppose to be, my mother?!"_

"_Mikan Sakura…"_

_-------------------------------------------------------------------------_

Author's comments(?)

YAY! Almost summer vacation, by then I'll be free to write anytime. Sorry for the late update for this and the delayed update for Torn Away (which'll probably be updated sometime this week) THANX AGAIN FOR THE REVIEWS!! D

**Suggestions are accepted— Leave a review again?**


	3. Change

**Unknown side**

_--------------------_

_By XxMEOWxMeWxX_

_-----------------_

_It took time getting' other ideas for TA so I'm gonna get this updated frist_

_\\\\\\\\\_

_2 weeks and 01 days left till freedom…_

_THX FOR ALL WHO REVIEWED! LUV YA_

_By the way, it's always Mikan's POV unless it says that it's someone else's POV_

_**-xXx-**_

_**Three: Change**_

_**-xXx-**_

"_Look at the garbage, cowering in the corner," someone whispered._

_Fear washed over the chibi Mikan. What did they want from her? Did you have to show your Alice to become one of the Alice users? Was she lower then the bullies?_

_I hated it when Hotaru's called away, there's no one to protect me._

_A girl came. From my point of view, they were all faceless; they were monsters and devils and demons._

_This couldn't be good if she approached me._

_The girl kicked me. "Go back to where you belong! We're better then you so go back to the dump where all the garbage are thrown into!"_

"_Yea! Listen to Sumire!"_

"_What're you doing here?"_

"_We don't want you! You ain't one of us"_

_The action became more and more brutal now. Someone else kicked me and some other person got their hands on a stick. I tell you, I ain't a piñata._

"_Get away from her you scum bags," someone said coolly. "What makes you better then her anyway? If she doesn't have an Alice then she wouldn't be here"_

_I turned to look at my savior…_

My eyes snapped open. I was… at the hospital? Shoot. The fan club is going to get it now. I went over to where my stuff was hanged and quickly changed back, ignoring the pain that came from everywhere in my body.

Some blood was on my clothing but quickly disappeared as I used my Alice.

I swore to myself even if I was to die, I would never go to the hospital. It was just a useless place, no one can really get cured, lies everywhere. I hated being helpless, now that I had it there was no point in lying anymore. If I was to die, then I'll spend my last days on earth showing my true self and the first thing I'm going to do is to crush the fan club.

I snickered. Now the tables have turned.

I pulled my hair into a ponytail instead of the ridiculous pigtails and headed out the door and rushed to the exit so I wouldn't be spotted, into the white world. If only life was actually like that…

5 more steps till I wouldn't be able to be spotted…

"Hey! A patient of Imai's has disappeared!"

Shoot…

4…

3…

2…

Yes, a home run.

It was probably in the morning because it was chilling even in my normal winter clothing.

"Oi, Polka-Dots, where do you think you're going," a voice behind me asked.

"Oh lookie here, ain't you supposed to be cuddled with one of your fan girls right now? In bed maybe and having your little fun? Hmm? Maybe you should mind your own business and leave me alone!"

The famous playboy raised an eyebrow. "… Are you ok? You're getting uglier like that."

"Anyway…" he continued with a devil smirk on his lips. "You're on _my _property.

Crap… I was at the Sakura tree…

"Who said it's your property?" I asked and turned to leave. Where I was going, I hadn't had a clue but one thing's for certain, it's ok as long as I get away from all the jerks.

A hand landed on my shoulder. "You think I'd let you go that easily?" he asked.

I turned and threw a punch which he blocked. I hate that bastard so much! "Go away cuz you disgust me. Who're you suppose to be, my mother?!"

And for the first time, I used one of my Alices: the water alice. I made them in the shapes of dragons which attacked him and grew water wings.

_Fire's no match for water._

------

-Meanwhile…-

On top of a tree, away from view a person stood with a cold smile on his lips. A white mask disguised his appearance.

"Mikan Sakura…" he muttered and disappeared

-------

_Light in darkness,_

_There's no such thing._

_Evil hisses,_

_The crows sing._

_Reality is faced,_

_Darkness is spotted._

_Not one target missed,_

_The devil nodded._

"I can't believe it, is that Sakura?"

"I know, she's…"

"I bet she's just pretending to get attention or something."

"Yea, that Sakura is so full of herself."

"Um, Sumire… there's a spider on your hair."

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH"

I smirked. The deserved that… and more. **MUCH MORE**.

_--------------_

_--- N E X_ _T_ --- _T I M E---_

_------------_

_Chapter four: Destruction_

_"What? What are you sayin'?"_

_"Y-you know?"_

_"WHAT THE-"_

_"Damn you Persona..."_

_-------------------------------------------------------------------------_

A/N: Watcha' think of this chapter? Too short or long or whatever? BTW this is an MxN fic. T.T I have a load of homework; damn life… anyway so TA'll be delayed… again. Sorry… Thx the one suggestion I got, any others'll be appreciated too and I REALLY need suggestions for vengence against the fan club, really in need of ideas so help'll be appreciated!

**-N—Y\\\//a-**


	4. Destruction

**Unknown side**

_--------------------_

_By XxMEOWxMeWxX_

_-----------------_

_Yay! I'm out of school! . but now I'm even more busy then when I'm in school during the weekdays T-T_

**Half of the lyrics did show so I'm updating again, sorry! (I think Chemicals React was sang by Aly and Aj)**

_By the way, it's always Mikan's POV unless it says that it's someone else's POV_

_**-xXx-**_

_**Four: Destruction**_

_**-xXx-**_

---Normal---POV---

Mikan walked away from the screaming girls. If they were all like that only because of a small water spider (they didn't notice it was made of water, too busy doing their job: screaming) then how can they survive the real Mikan Sakura's revenge?

She coolly strolled to the classroom and sat, ignoring the students that were looking at her with faces that resembled a fish out of the water… everyone except her manger.

'_She knew already…" _Mikan thought but ignored the feeling of… sadness?

Hotaru came up to her and calmly gave her a signal that resembled a song for a CD.

"This is the song and the lyrics, memorize them in class…" she trailed off.

Mikan looked at the script, 'Chemicals React' it read.

_That's what I'm feeling._

-

-

Throughout the day, Mikan ignored the stares of her classmates, reread the lyrics for the song and took her pleasurable time making the club members' life miserable… especially that arrogant 'leader', Permy.

Many people were gaping at her, what is there to see?

I headed towards my correction his bedroom since I'm the one that always sleeps in the hall but perhaps there will be something different from now on.

I smirked, _another one to take down._

Meanwhile… (Normal POV)

"Imai," a blond boy said reaching out to grab the blackmailer's arm.

"What?" Hotaru said in her normal tone of voice as she turned around to face Ruka.

The animal lover seemed nervous about something as his eyes trailed on the ground trying to find the right words to say because a wrong word said to Hotaru Imai will cost total humiliation with the (coughs) pictures.

"About Mikan-chan," Ruka started. "She's… different today. Do you know why?"

Hotaru looked at him blankly, as if it was the easiest question to answer in the whole world.

"If I tell you, then what will I get out of it?" she asked.

"She's _your _best friend, would she be happy if she knew that you were using to make money?!" Ruka asked/shouted.

The he softened up as he noticed Hotaru's eyes, normal people wouldn't have noticed but he knew… somehow. They were the only thing that gave him hints of how she feels and it gave away shock, regret and… sadness…?

"I'm sorry, got carried away there," said Ruka.

Hotaru's eyes went back to what the used to be and hidden the little emotion she just showed.

"I was just joking with you, can't believe you fell for it," she said and took out a camera. "I got my payment anyway."

Before Ruka said anything, Hotaru continued. "Mikan… was an orphan, did you not know? She never had anyone to turn to. All she had was herself and all the problems she had she solved it herself too. So she became devoted with acting and singing. Maybe she doesn't want to trouble others so she turned everything she needs and feels to herself."

Ruka blinked. What was she saying? So what? Mikan was a orphan and only had herself and didn't tell others about her problems (probably 'cuz she was too nice) and likes to act and sing.

"So what? What are you sayin' about Mikan's actions today?"

"Her true self," Hotaru said plainly and hopped on her duck scooter leaving a very confused boy to figure out her best friend.

Then the puzzle pieces placed themselves together in Ruka's mind.

_No one to turn to, devoted to acting, true self…_

The animal lover finally got it. Mikan was _too_ nice, _too_ cheerful, _too_ bright. Plus she had such a past that it wasn't normal for one to behave like that. She was an ANGEL!! Okay joking, she was _too_ extreme and – now that he think about it – _too_ unreal.

((((Back to M.I.K.A.N))))

The door slammed open in the Hyuuga/Sakura room: 207 and entered a certain brunette. The black cat was no where to be seen.

_He'd better hide_, Mikan thought as she closed the door and headed towards her bed. Since the room was a boy/girl pairing, there were two closets on either sides of the room that was big enough to store twenty-five people in. The roommates change and undress and etc in there and there was also two bathrooms for both genders.

All of a sudden, Mikan felt drowsy. _I might've used my alice too much…_

It was true since during the whole day, the screaming of fan girls were heard. Mysterious creatures appeared and, somehow, avoided every student that wasn't in the fan club. There were millions of pranks played and in the end, the only trace left behind was water. The teachers are calling this the water phantom.

**oO-----oOo-----Oo**

"_Get away from her you scum bags," someone said coolly. "What makes you better then her anyway? If she didn't have an alice then she wouldn't be here."_

_One of the devils scowled. "Whatever," it said and left and the rest of them followed._

_He walked towards me. I closed my eyes and braced for impact. It must be one of the alice users' tricks. No one was ever nice to me other then Hotaru._

"_You shouldn't let them push you around like that," he said and got out a napkin and tended to a wound on my forehead. Was I bleeding? I didn't notice. It happened to often._

"_T-Thank you…" I said and stared at the ground._

_S.I.L.E.N.C.E_

"_Um… I didn't see you around here before, are you-"_

_The boy didn't give the small me a chance to talk. The held my wrist and dragged me up. "C'mon, I have something to show you. Don't just sit there all your life. You have to live it to the fullest!"_

_I followed him. "Where are we going?" _

"_You'll see," he replied and stopped at a young Sakura tree._

"_This was the only cherry tree around here. It can be our secret hang out"_

_Hang out… hang out… hang out_

_I smiled. "By the way, what is your name?"_

"_It's- _

"Oi, baka" a voice said.

I groaned. "Go away Natsume-_kun_," I said smugly and opened my eyes.

"You shouldn't sleep in broad daylight, or are you such a baby that you need your nap?" he asked.

"Whatever," I replied as I glared at him.

"So this is your true self," he said.

I wanted to say 'Y-you know?' but refrained. In the previous few weeks it was getting hard to pretend plus I still didn't know who the three figures I saw were before I collapsed on the snow. That memory drove rage to me and all I wanted to do now was to snap Permy's ridiculous head off of her puny body and kick it around like a soccer ball.

"I guess my acting hadn't been that good these days," I replied instead. Glancing at the watch it show that I should get going to Hotaru's lab to dress up.

I left without another word.

--Normal POV--.

Mikan left the door and then Natsume hopped on the bed thinking about the mission he had yesterday. He flinched at the memory of the first mission he went to and the circumstances he was forced to agree with.

Natsume's hand slipped under his bed and took a particular manga from the sea of mangas and opened it. It was actually not a manga instead but a picture. The frame and cover and everything was designed in such detail that anyone other the owner would think that it was just another book.

The picture inside included a picture of a small Natsume on the Sakura tree with a smiling girl in his arms. Chibi Natsume was glaring at the camera when the girl was smiling into it.

Natsume looked at the picture without showing any emotion whatsoever and then put it away under his bed.

---**x**---**xXx**---**x**---

"Alright Miss Sakura, anytime."

Mikan rolled her eyes in annoyance. Why do they bother with the same line over and over again?

(A/N: go to http:// youtube . com /watch?vYIuWEN8x7Q （W/O spaces）for example of the song, if you want to that is… :P)

_you make me feel out of my element  
like I'm walkin' on broken glass  
like my worlds spinnin' in slow motion  
and you're movin' too fast_

(chorus)  
were you right, was I wrong  
were you weak, was I strong, yeah  
both of us broken  
caught in the moment  
we lived and we loved  
and we hurt and we joked, yeah  
but the planets all aligned  
when you looked into my eyes  
and just like that  
the chemicals react  
the chemicals react

you make me feel out of my element  
like I'm drifting out to the sea  
like the tides pullin' me in deeper  
makin' it harder to breathe  


One of the recorders nudged Hotaru and in return she gave him a death glare.

"Um… Miss Imai, Miss Sakura's song sounds better… different. Do you know why?"

She continued to glare at him and somehow, the recorder knew that if he talked again, he would sign his death sentence.

"we cannot deny, how we feel inside  
we cannot deny

(chorus)  
"were you right, was I wrong  
were you weak, was I strong, yeah  
both of us broken  
caught in the moment  
we lived and we loved  
and we hurt and we joked, yeah  
but the planets all aligned  
when you looked into my eyes  
and just like that  
the chemicals react  
the chemicals react

"kaleidoscope of colors  
turning hopes on fire, sun is burning  
shining down on both of us  
don't let us lose it (don't let us lose it...)

(chorus)  
"were you right, was I wrong  
were you weak, was I strong, yeah  
both of us broken  
caught in the moment  
we lived and we loved  
and we hurt and we joked, yeah

"we lived  
we loved  
we hurt  
we joked  
we're right  
we're wrong  
we're weak  
we're strong  
we lived to love

"Bravo! That was great. I know you've got a lot of things on your calendar with a private gakuen and everything but there's going to be a live concert around one to two months away and many artists are going to perform," the director, Mia said.

"We'll be there," Hotaru said emotionally and we headed towards to the limo.

Mikan stared out the window. _That song was painful for me somehow. It was different like I had memories with the song…_

-

-

Mikan's POV-------

I stumbled into the dorm. I swear if Natsume was in there making out then I'm going to throw both of them out the window.

"Welcome back, Miss Sakura," said a man in a white mask.

"WHAT THE-" I started but remembered that I was shouting. "How did you get in here? And who are you?"

He smiled. "Persona, pleased to meet you."

He was cold and dangerous for sure. Who knew there were people like this were in the happy-go-lucky academy.

"Back to the topic. I'm here to make sure you agree to something. Do you want to be stronger?"

"…"

"You have the water alice don't you?"

The teachers were bound to find out sooner or later so who cares?

"Yes," I said plainly.

"You'll undergo missions with the black cat. It's not like you have a choice anyway"

"…"

As Persona rambled on about missions and training and AAO stuff I failed to notice a pair of crimson eyes staring into the room from outside the window.

"Damn you Persona…"

And so it began, the destruction of my peaceful… ok not so peaceful, but you get what I mean, life.

_-------------------------------------------------------------------------_

A/N: I hope this will fill in the days that I've been lacking out. Any song requests? && Thanks to all those who reviewed last chapter! D

**Nya, review?**


	5. Life has no 'Happily ever afters'

**Unknown side**

_--------------------_

_By XxMEOWxMeWxX_

_-----------------_

_Thanks for the review on chapters 3&&4!: __**shikyoneko, angelakawaii, okaix, Chin-92, lysabelle, guest, Cari-Sahimi, yamishun, wakakakakaa, Chimeiteki Ai, foresaken3093, comicworm, purplish024, blacktangerine012, shar17, Sie-sama, interaction, Arahi Sakura, Lakadoko, Sakura-chan0610, kemcat16, kradraven**__**，**__**denii05, XxXSmileyXxX, Cee-chan, Plaiid, and Sunkised-chan (((sorry if I missed anyone!)))**_

_Yay,,, got the perfect plot, another thx for the people that gave suggestions!! Rudiments test on SOON so there's sooooo much homework, T-T it doesn't feel like summer vacation…_

Aargh! Not all of the lyrics showed up… AGAIN, Life can be so unfair sometimes T-T

_**-xXx-**_

_**Five: Life has no 'happily ever afters'**_

_**-xXx-**_

'_Meet at the normal place tomorrow at midnight'_

I crumpled the paper into a ball and aimed for the waste pan. Because of all the stupid training, it was impossible to miss.

"You should destroy the evidence" a voice came from the other side of the room. Since he saw the reaction I had when I read it, he must've known what it was about.

"When did you become the boss of me?" I asked.

He smirked. "Ever since Persona assigned me to be your trainer."

Damn that Hyuuga!

"That doesn't mean anything. Anyway, meet tomorrow at midnight." I said and turned away.

Natsume got up and exited the room, when I no longer can hear his footsteps I sighed and collapsed on the bed. That basterd's probably just looking for some other girl to play with.

A month ago I added new problems to my life and now, everything was cramped together; missions, training, auditions, concerts, rehearsals, tests… I barely even have time to think before I was rushed to another. That live concert's coming up soon and the songs weren't even decided yet!

My life's so messed up… like me.

Living without a purpose, without something to live for is so empty. It's like nothing can fill the gap of darkness or can anything pull me out of my darkness. Sometimes if feels like life's passing me by, like I'm watching life go by without me. There are times when I'm surrounded by people yet I felt so alone, when life was so cold and gloomy and colorless on a perfect bright sunshiny day.

Sometimes I wonder what the point of living is. The one answer I got was to see what's in stored in the future but I don't want to know what's going on in the future, there's probably just some laughs, crys, misery, sorrow, joy, etc… so what's the point?

I fell on my bed. What is the point of living for me?

**-O-O-O-0**-**O-O-O-0-O-O-O-0-O-O-O-**

"Good morning my beautiful students!" said the ever-annoying teacher.

"Today we are going to watch a slideshow and afterwards it's free period," he said while clapping his hands together and a projector appeared out of nowhere. "Enjoy and Adios! The substituted will take care of things afterwards!"

And so the slideshow started:

**The three hardest things to say**

**-**

**The three hardest things to say are:**

**1) Thank you**

**2) I love you**

**3) I need help**

**-**

**Those who wears red wants to be beautiful**

**-**

**Those who wear yellow are confident**

**-**

**Those who wears black doesn't want to be noticed. They are the ones that need help.**

**-**

**Have you ever thought that those who protect others need to be protected?**

_Have you ever thought that those who protect others need to be protected…Have you ever thought that those who protect others need to be protected…Have you ever thought that those who protect others need to be protected…?_

Somehow that verse was stuck in my mind like there was some relation to the weird dreams and flashbacks I had before and the gaps in my memory. Everyone forgets stuff, I know, but it I can't recall what I did during the summer when I was 14; I mean I go through my life and when I think about that summer it's just blank.

I sighed mentally and focused back to the slideshow.

"**Spread the word and make this world a better place!" (-Added by Narumi)**

**-Fin-**

I raised my eyebrow. Now that I think of it, what kind of slideshow was that? It doesn't have anything to do with school.

Before you know it, the lights turned on and the projector disappeared with the pathetic sub was cowering in the corner.

Hotaru came up to me. "Mikan."

I nodded and followed her outside. "These are the songs that your performing at the multi-artist live concert." And she handed me a yellow folder.

Great… more things added to my 'to do' list.

Now looking at the class, it was crazy. It looked like a grade 5 classroom with all the people goofing around, all the things flying in the air, all the girls crowding Natsume.

Flipping open the folder I checked the songs. Probably only one or two songs max.

**1) Famous last words **

**2) Behind these hazel eyes**

**3) Because I'm a girl**

I rolled my eyes, bor-ing.

F

A

S

T

-

F

O

R

W

A

R

D

"Right on time." His voice makes me fill with hatred

"Spit out the mission, Persona" said the raven haired boy in the cat mask.

Persona smiled. "Now, now, there's no rush."

"There's a traitor, a female, that sided with the AAO and is going to get transferred today, kill her." And then he dismissed us.

It's amazing, two words such as 'kill her' can cause so much misery. Just two words.

///NoRMal PoV///

Soon there was a clearing and it revealed a road. A black limo was the only car on the road currently considering it was already passed midnight. The limo was guided my unnatural shadows that camouflaged it.

In a matter of mere seconds, the peaceful quiet night was shattered. Fire and shouting, the attacks of the defenses, the sound of bullets… To the normal eye, everything was like a tape that was fast forwarded.

Soon there was bloodshed, screams of horror filled the air and then soon quieted. Then, at last, it was quiet again, deathly quiet. Only the sound of sobbing left.

The woman was around in her mid twenties was the only person alive in the car. Burn marks were everywhere.

"I knew life had no happily ever afters but.." she said while a lock of her blond hair fell into her face.

But the sentence she ment to say never had time to leave her mouth as the car engulfed in flames. Soon, there was an explosion of the gas tank and the two shadows retreated in silence.

-

Mikan's PoV

"…So you're a celebrity…" he said, breaking the silence.

"I know I'm one" and then sent him a questioning look.

"_That person _sent me to go with you to a concert."

My heart did a flip, or whatever you called it, though I have no idea why. Sometimes it feels… comforting or something to be around the jerk.

"You're coming next week?" I asked

"Are you deaf or did you not hear me?"

"Well, sorry for being so deaf idiot."

"Polka-dots"

"Basterd"

"Useless garbage"

My eyes widened a little bit though that was the worst diss I've ever heard, it had a effect on me. What the fuck is wrong with me?

"…Go to hell."

OoOOooOOoOOOoo

"Mikan."

"What?" I asked as I turned to Hotaru.

"Why's he with us?" she asked, eyeing Natsume.

"So he can be of entertainment when we're bored."

"…"

I sighed. "He's here for protection"

Even though I talked and argued with Persona, it had no effect on the mule. A week pasted quickly and now we're in a limo heading for the central plaza in Tokyo.

Soon we got there and from then, everything was a blur. When the show starts, it looks all organized and yea but behind the stage was a completely different world. Everything was a mess; mangers calling for singers, make-up everywhere along with clothing, director calling attendance, it was a mess. Being rushed from one place to another and before I know it, it was my turn on the stage.

During the wait, I figured it out. Maybe, just maybe I liked Natsume. But unlike the other fan girls that he has, I'm not in my fantasies. I'm not trying or going to try to adore Natsume and get addicted to him, I'm not going to make me like him.

"Sakura you're up!"

I took a deep breath. Why? 'Cause I knew that life has no happily ever afters just like that traitor woman knew.

With that I stepped onto the stage.

_Because life has no happily ever afters…_

_-------------------------------------------------------------------------_

A/N: I hope this will fill in the days that I've been lacking out. ARGHHH I'M ALMOST FREE! Yay! Then I can update all I've want!! Sorry for the late update! I'm thinking of completing this fic and then focusing on other ones but it's hard…

**Leave a review plzz! **

_**Next time::**_

_**Chapter six: The past, the present, and the truth**_

'_Flashbacks?!'_

"_Natsume…"_

"_Hand it over"_

**The truth of the --------**


	6. The past, the present, and the truth

**Unknown side**

_--------------------_

_By XxMEOWxMeWxX_

_-----------------_

_- _cuts the song and add a flashback to it, don't wanna miss them!

_**-xXx-**_

_**Chapter six: The past, the present, and the truth**_

_**-xXx-**_

Love is strange. This is the first time I've felt it towards a guy but is it possible to love and hate someone at the same time?

The words "Mikan Sakura!" and the ear shrieking cheer from the fans shook Mikan to reality with the first thought of _Me like Natsume? NO WAY!_ In her mind as she stepped onto the stage.

_(My Chemical Romance)_

_Now I know,  
That I can't make you stay.  
But where's your heart?  
But where's your heart?  
But where's your,_

And I know.  
There's nothing I can say.  
To change that part.  
To change that part.  
To change.  


'even if I life Natsume which is NOT possible, there's not way he'll like me'

_  
So many,  
Bright lights they cast a shadow,  
But can I speak?  
Well is it hard understanding,  
I'm incomplete?  
A life that's so demanding,  
I get so weak.  
A love that's so demanding,  
I can't speak._

'How can one feel so alone when surrounded by thousands of fans?'__

I am not afraid to keep on living,  
I am not afraid to walk this world alone  
Honey if you stay I'll be forgiven,  
Nothing you can say can stop me going home.

Can you see?  
My eyes are shining bright,  
'Cause I'm out here, on the other side,  
Of a jet black hotel mirror,  
And I'm so weak.  
Is it hard understanding?  
I'm incomplete.  
A love that's so demanding,  
I get weak.

_-Flashback_

"_But whats wrong? Why… are you acting so strange all of a sudden?"_

_It was the boy that I saw in my dream… the one that saved me!_

_His __bangs covered his face. _

_A__nd a just before he turned away, I could see a silver droplet rolling down his check_

_-._

I am not afraid to keep on living,  
I am not afraid to walk this world alone  
Honey if you stay I'll be forgiven,  
Nothing you can say can stop me going home.

_-Flash back_

_The background of cherry blossoms as a young brunette held the raven haired little boys. They twirled in circles and fell onto the grass and burst into laughter._

_-_

I am not afraid to keep on living,  
I am not afraid to walk this world alone  
Honey if you stay I'll be forgiven,

_-_

"_Ne ne! Look at this! A caterpillar!" the brunette said._

_The little boy poked it with a stick and it squirmed__ away while the two of them watched intensely and still staring at it until the boy burst into laughter at his ridiculous actions. Soon the girl joined him in the laughter._

_-_

Nothing you can say can stop me going home.  
These bright lights have always blinded me.  
These bright lights have always blinded me.  
I say.

_-_

"_Wait there, I'll get bandages!" the little boy said as he rushed off to the dormitories._

"_Hurry!" the little girl said with a tear stained face._

_-_

I see you lying next to me,  
With words I thought I'd never speak,  
Awake, and unafraid.  
Asleep, or dead.

'Cause I see you lying next to me,  
With words I thought I'd never speak,  
Awake, and unafraid.  
Asleep, or dead.

'Cause I see you lying next to me,  
With words I thought I'd never speak,  
Awake, and unafraid.  
Asleep, or dead.

_-_

"_Geez," said the little boy in a concerned voice. "Try to look where your going Mikan."_

"_Sorry" the little brunette sniffed._

_He __smiled "it's ok."_

_-_

'Cause I see you lying next to me,  
With words I thought I'd never speak,  
Awake, and unafraid.

Asleep, or dead...

I am not afraid to keep on living,  
I am not afraid to walk this world alone  
Honey if you stay I'll be forgiven,  
Nothing you can say can stop me going home.

'these flashbacks…" Mikan thought. "I… don't remember them'__

I am not afraid to keep on living,  
I am not afraid to walk this world alone  
Honey if you stay I'll be forgiven,  
Nothing you can say can stop me going home.

I am not afraid to keep on living,  
I am not afraid to walk this world alone  
Honey if you stay I'll be forgiven,  
Nothing you can say can stop me going home.

The song ended and there was a blast of shrieks and cheers.

"Ms. Sakura will end her performance with 'Behind these hazel eyes'" the announcer said as the cheers continued and the new song started playing.

_Seems like just yesterday  
You were a part of me  
I used to stand so tall  
I used to be so strong_

_-_

'_Why are you doing this?" the brunette said as she chocked back another sob. Her face was tear stained. _

_T__his is me… two years ago? _

_- _

_  
Your arms around me tight  
Everything, it felt so right  
_

_-_

"_Hand it over"_

_-_

_Unbreakable, like nothin' could go wrong  
Now I can't breathe_

_-_

_The boy she called to kept on walking away. _

_-_

_  
No, I ca__n't sleep  
I'm barely hanging on  
Here I am, once again  
I'm torn into pieces  
Can't deny it, can't pretend  
Just thought you were the one  
_

_Broken up, deep inside  
But you won't get to see the tears I cry  
Behind these hazel eyes  
_

_-_

"_I thought you were my friend! How could you?!" _

_-_

_  
I told you everything  
Opened up and let you in  
You made me feel alright  
For once in my life  
Now all that's left of me  
Is what I pretend to be  
_

_-_

"_You were the one that declared that by yourself"_

_-_

_So together, but so broken up inside  
'Cause I can't breathe  
No, I can't sleep  
I'm barely hangin' on  
_

_-_

_The younger brunette's eyes opened in shock, her face crumpled with pain._

_-_

_  
Here I am, once again  
I'm torn into pieces  
Can't deny it, can't pretend  
Just thought you were the one  
Broken up, deep inside  
But you won't get to see the tears I cry  
Behind these hazel eyes  
_

"_Leave me alone. Your no one. Just a useless pile of __**junk**__. No one needs __**you**__. No one needs to cares about you, and no one will ever like or love you."_

_-  
Swallow me then spit me out  
For hating you, I blame myself  
Seeing you it kills me now  
No, I don't cry on the outside  
Anymore... Anymore  
_

_-_

"_Go die and no one will notice" he continued._

_-_

_  
Here I am, once again  
I'm torn into pieces  
Can't deny it, can't pretend  
Just thought you were the one  
_

_-_

_T__he brunette crumpled onto the floor as the other guy continued to walk._

_-_

_Broken up, deep inside  
But you won't get to see the tears I cry  
Behind these hazel eyes  
There are hardly tears alive  
_

_-_

"_I- I trusted you!"_

_-_

_  
Here I am, once again  
I'm torn into pieces  
Can't deny it, can't pretend  
_

_-_

"_You decided that yourself" he said. "I never needed you."_

_-_

_Just thought you were the one  
Broken up, deep inside  
_

_-_

"_I- I hate you-"_

_But you won't get to see the tears I cry  
Behind these hazel eyes  
There are hardly tears alive_

Mikan opened her eyes and was surprised to that the crowd was silent. She realized that a teardrop fell onto her face.

Then the crowd went WILD WILD! The loudest of the whole show!

Mikan's POV

I walked off the stage and tried to dodge the flowers being thrown onto the stage.

But how did I cry? I never cried… or did I?

My life was screwed, I couldn't even remember my own memories!

-

----

-------

----

-

"Your in my spot"

It was none other then the famous Natsume Hyuuga. Carrying a comic book as usual and ditching that gay teacher's class.

"Or do you want to get burned?"

I ignored it.

He raised a eyebrow and then soon after flames caught my hair. Of course I could've just nullified it but then something stopped me.

"_I- I hate you, NATSUME!"_

Then everything went blank.

_-------------------------------------------------------------------------_

**Care to leave a review?**

_**Next time::**_

_**Chapter seven- Lost history.**_


	7. Fate works in mysterious ways

**Unknown side**

_--------------------_

_By XxMEOWxMeWxX_

_-----------------_

Hi people! I'm back after a long, long, LONG time. Sorry for the _tres_ late update. My New Years resolution includes updating more often on a weekly basis, hehe. Enjoy!

WARNING: I think this is a realllyyy confusing story with all the mood swings from rebellious to acting all bubbly to depression. If you think that it's too confusing then just tell me, I can probably try to twist those parts a bit.

_**-xXx-**_

_**Chapter Seven: Fate works in Mysterious Ways**_

_**-xXx-**_

_I remember now… _I thought opening my eyes to see only darkness that surrounds me.

Everything about life is screwed. Why do we live? Who decides our future? Why is life so unfair? Anger bubbled up, hatred rose.

Why not just die? Life is meaningless, there's only loneliness and hatred and pain. Everyone's so evil, no one cares… Why feel feelings, why smile? Life is all lies. We were all born and our purpose is death. That's what I think.

Life… it's meaningless… just when you think you had a meaning to live, just when it gives you hope, it abandons you.

I only have one thing left: my hatred towards _him_. The one that gave a feeling of wanting to live and laugh and cry like everyone else. The one that had me feel happiness for the first time. The one that abandoned me even after he knew that all my life back then revolved around him. _He _had given me something to live for, and it was _he_ that left me feeling barren. _Natsume Hyuuga, I hate you._

----

Normal POV

---

_What the fuck? Why didn't she nullify it? _a certain boy thought as he headed towards the dormitories. Opening the special star rooms in entered and slammed the doors. 

He growled in frustration and punched the wall even though he knew that he was only going to suffer from cuts afterwards but he didn't care. _Why is everything so out of control?_

He didn't want to face the fact that the woman that they killed, that traitor was his "partner's" mother. One that abandoned her daughter for her daughters' sake and eventually was killed by the exact same person that she tried so hard to protect; even though her appearance was different, the academy was sure it was her... Yuka Sukura.

He didn't even know why he was so angry. Why did he feel this way about killing this girl's parent? Why did he feel that it was wrong not to tell her even though Persona told him not to tell her? _Why?_

He returned to his bed after making many dents in the steel-hard walls and was just about to fall unto his bed why something caught his eyes. It looks strangely familiar, buried in a dark- usually unnoticeable- corner under _her_ bed. Natsume got up and went on to his knees to reach the box.

It was a regular brown box about the size of a computer screen; the cover had a thick layer of dust. Scratches and dents along with stains proved how old the box was.

Slowly Natsume opened the box and his eyes widened. _No way…_

I guess you can say sometimes fate works in mysterious ways. (Nya: insert evil smirk here from yours truly (eyes glints, readers sweat drops))

-

-

"Stop right there! You're in no condition to move-" yelled one of those block head doctors.

"I'll do as I please," I said as a climbed up the opened window, preparing to jump.

"I can call Persona and we'll see what he has prepared for you," another doctor said. Instead of being all panicky like all the others, this one was emotionless and… familiar.

I sat on the windowsill to face that voice.

"You must be Dr. Imai," I said. _Now this is getting interesting…_

Hotaru's brother stared at me. "And you must be Sakura Mikan," he said. "If you use your alice at this time, it'll only have a impact on your life force. You are in no condition to use it," he continued noticing the beads of sweat on my forehead.

But I wasn't tired at all, it wasn't that I was 'too weak' to move. It was just that I loathed hospitals… because it was where _they _were killed. To underestimate a baby's memories is a disadvantage.

"Don't make me repeat my words. Anyway you know nothing about me… or my alice" I added.

With that and a smirk I leaned backwards and disappeared from their view water surrounded me and soon wings formed.

_Whoa, I have some serious mood swings these days, _I thought as I headed for our dorm.

-

-

-

Normal POV

Mikan flew all the way from the hospital to her room without being spotted by anyone. She managed to get near the window and opening it without trouble and climbed in.

_Even with these simple tasks I'm starting to get weary. Maybe I should've stayed in the hospital… but with all that I don't think I can handle it._

"So you're finally back" a voice came from the other side of the room. She looked up only to find a pair of Ruby eyes staring intensely at her.

He walk forward towards her before he was stopped be a somewhat hysterical "get away from me," from the brunette.

Mikan swore that she'll get her revenge on him before she leaves but seeing him and comparing him with the figure from her memories… it was too much. _Was he always like this? _she thought. Was she always so aware of his presence without consciously knowing it?

_This is just like before_, she thought. _When I… loved him._

Suddenly it occurred to her maybe she was so depressed, maybe the reason that she acted rebellious, maybe the reason that she acted as if she was another person was because of him; because she was afraid of being hurt again.

_That's why I hate love. Because it's like a rollercoaster. Getting you high and low and confused. _

(Nya: O.o sorry if this story's getting… out of control. I don't even get parts of this chapter myself… well I sorta do. It's just that one minute she hates him and the next she feels like she likes him and then she's all confused – that's love. Just trying my best to describe it, hehe)

"I'm sorry," he said and embraced her before she had the chance to react.

(Nya: Eww it's getting so CHEESY)

"What the fudge?! Let go of me!"

"You don't know even half of the story of why I did _that_ two years ago," he whispered.

"… What do you mean I don't know? I knew everything" Mikan said in a dangerously calm voice.

Natsume let go of her. "It all started then…"

_**End of Chapter 7**_

Nya: Sorry if this chappy was a bit confusing. If you don't get or like it and think that this chapter sticks out like a sore thumb in this plot or your just going like 'huh?' plz tell me! Hopefully you'll like this weird twisted story so yea… Hope ya leave a review, I usually start the new chapter after 10 reviews… hehe


	8. Untangling memories

**Unknown side**

_--------------------_

_By XxMEOWxMeWxX_

_-----------------_

_**-xXx-**_

_**Chapter Eight: Untangling Memories**_

_**-xXx-**_

"。。。…when you came back to the gakuen again."

It was stupid, I admit it. _I _was stupid because no matter what happens I can't seem to stay mad that that idiot for long. And before I knew it, I was falling for him again.

Ok get this cheesy scene into your brains: standing in front of a window, under the moonlight, with his arms around me. Crazy, I know since a few moments ago I was looking for something to kill. But then again, how can you _not_ be calm when the campus's heartthrob has his arms around you?

"You're going on missions, you know the conditions we have to bare with. I had to push you away… to protect you," he said calmly as if he rehearsed it millions of times inside his head before. And it was all for this one moment.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

_Two years ago: SUMMER_

_Natsume walked silently across the floor of the Northern Forest, avoiding dried leaves and small animals; trying his best to be silence. It was stupid, everything was crazy. His Mikan came back to visit him and yet he's forced to push her away. Again and again. Why can't she just leave him alone for once? he grumbled inside his head. Times had changed since he last seen her, back then when they were kids and when everything was plain and simple._

_He saved her from 'bullies' and then, in return, she had befriended him. He still remembers the happiness that he felt for the first time in his life. Although he was much more innocent back then, he was still scared from all the loneliness around him. _

_It was the memories from back then that had kept him going throughout these years, like the single streak of light in the dark world. _

_When he had agreed to help the academy by doing missions, he had also agreed to push everyone away from him, for everyone else's safety. And he never had big problems doing it…. that is until she came back into his life._

_It was stupid how the infamous Black Cat has a soft spot for a certain brunette. And once Persona realizes this, who knows what will happen to her. No, he just had to bare the fact that he has to push her away all the time; for her safety._

_The boy sighted. And then he looked at what was in his hand: a red, transparent Alice stone stolen from one of the many AAO hideouts. It was the legendary Alice stone or something. It won't ever fade away and has almost every Alice inside it. A deadly weapon one can say. _

_Natsume couldn't believe that he had survived and completed the hardest mission that was given to him so far. Others went with him, of course, but it was he that got the prized possession. After he got the Alice stone, he had rushed back to the Academy when the rest the Academy's pawns cleaned up after him._

_He smirks while thinking about the others who were probably still cleaning up._

_But his 'happiness' was short lived as he sensed something was wrong. Natsume stopped walking and narrowed his eyes. Something was misplaced. Had one of the others accidentally let a member of the AAO slip pass them? He hoped not._

"_Who's there?" his voice echoed through the forest._

_The figure step from the tree that they hid behind, and to his surprise it was the last person he expected to be standing in front of him._

_No, it was not Persona, or an AAO member. But it was the brunette that he was thinking about mere seconds ago. Why did life hate him so badly?_

_Her chocolate eyes had determination written all over them._

_Natsume stared at her. "What are you doing here?" he demanded._

"_I was going to ask you the same question. I noticed that you sneaked out of your room almost every night," a clear voice replied._

_He growled. _

"_Anyways _I _have a much more important question to ask you," Mikan said. _

_Then that idiot took a step towards me. "Why are you behaving like this?" she demanded._

_To tell the truth I hadn't been expecting that question directed at me. "Why?" I heard myself replying._

"_Yes! You're so different from the last time I saw you. Are you still mad at me for leaving? If there's something you want to say, then say it to my face!"_

_Anger flooded me. Why can't she just leave me alone? How can she possibly know what I'm going through right now, the shitty situation I'm in? The fact that I CAN'T tell her anything. Can't she not be so annoying for once? And she talks as if she was the prey._

"_Stop buzzing in other people's business you idiot. This has nothing to do with you so you can just skip away to your happy little life!"_

_Mikan looked taken back at the harsh words of her fellow classmate. "B-But Natsume…" she trialed off._

"_Just leave me alone, I don't need your stupid voice chasing me around." _

_The girl crumpled onto the floor for a while before she reacted. "You were so different before Natsume," she said in a calm voice, totally different from the previous reactions. "I know who you really are inside. I remember the Natsume that was my friend years ago."_

"_Things change, people change. Now would you get out of my way now?"_

"_But… What's wrong Natsume," Hazel met crimson. "Why are you acting so strange all of a sudden?"_

"_You're so annoying," I growled. "Just get away from me. I don't need you anymore" _

_Damn it woman, save yourself! Just go away! _

_I turned away from her teary eyes as she shook her head. "You don't mean that! You don't mean that Natsume. Say it!" Then she took me by surprise as she ran towards me and took the Alice stone. _

"_Natsume, I demand some answers," she says when she ran to what she thought was an appropriate distance away from me. "This is important to you right?" She fingered the stone. "So I'm not going to give it back until you give me some answers."_

_And then Natsume let out a string of curses inside his head. Who knew he had such a wide vocabulary…?_

"_Just hand it over," I growled._

"_No!" the girl shrieked. "Natsume, I thought you were my friend! I wanted to see you so I came back to the gakuen again. Don't tell me that Permy affected you with her mean germs."_

"_I never said I was going to be you 'friend'" he answered. "You declared that all on your own."_

_Please Mikan… just get away from me…_

_An internal fight raged inside the raven haired boy. It took all he had to keep his cool as he struggled more and more…_

_The brunette's eyes opened in shock, her face crumpled with pain. _

_With that the boy snatched the Alice stone away from the vulnerable Mikan and spun on his heels._

_A calm breeze passed through the trees and once again the boy sensed that there was someone else watching them. Then at the corner of his eyes he caught the sight of a white mask. It could only be one person: Persona. _

_He forced himself not to growl, trying hard to put on the act. _

_I'm sorry Mikan…_

"_Leave me alone. You're no one; you're nothing to me. Just a useless pile of __**junk**__. No one needs __**you**__. No one needs to cares about you, and no one will ever like or love you."_

_Then he continued: "Why don't you just stop your pathetic struggle? You can disappear forever, die, and no one will ever notice."_

_For the second time that day, the brunette crumpled to the floor. _

"_I-I trusted you, Natsume! You were everything to me before."_

"_You declared that yourself," he forced out the words. "I'll say it again: never needed you." _

"_I-I hate you Natsume!" she screamed as the boy disappeared into the shadows where he can hide the tear that slipped from his face. He quickly wiped it off knowing that Persona was close by._

"_NATSUME NO BAKA!" echoed throughout the forest._

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

_**End of Chapter 8**_


	9. As Close As We Can

**Unknown side**

_--------------------_

_By XxMEOWxMeWxX_

_-----------------_

_**-xXx-**_

_**Chapter Nine: As Close As We Can Get**_

_**-xXx-**_

_Sometime in the Future… _

"Mikan, you're next in stage," Hotaru said as she stood by the frame of the door. She was in high heels and looking as mature and sophisticated as ever.

"Thanks Hotaru!" I said as I flashed a smile at her.

Hotaru started to leave but then stopped. "You've been through a lot these couple of years, I'm sorry that I wasn't much help."

I shook my head, "I was just being too naïve; for a while I could only see what I was missing in my life instead of appreciating what I have. I didn't see that you were there for me in your own way, you were just waiting for me to realize. A large part of living is letting go of our past and looking forward to what the future has for us."

_Baka, baka, baka._

I groaned as I rubbed my head. "What did you do that for? I was getting ready to go on stage!"

"That's what you get for talking like an old lady," Hotaru said as she turned to hide a small smile on her face. "By the way, good luck with Hyuuga."

"Hey, shouldn't you be wishing me luck for the concert instead?" I yelled to her retreating figure. That best friend of mine…

"Oi, Polka, you're late. Hurry up and get yourself onto that stage." I stuck my tongue at him and then hurriedly checked my hair to make sure that the baka gun didn't do any damage to it. And that was when I looked at the clock.

"Waaah, I'M LATE!" I shouted as I started to sprint in the direction of the stage.

"Baka," I heard him say as I rushed passed him.

A few months ago, I would've looked at this chapter of my life and vomited at the scene. How cheesy and mushy and carefree it was. But now, instead of playing the role of happy-go-lucky Mikan, I'm living in it.

Natsume asked me a few times why I had chosen this character to pretend to be before. I never really told him the answer; he's a genius, probably figure it out… eventually.

When we smile, it creates a comforting atmosphere, a false security. Being happy is the easiest way to hide feelings of frustration, of anger, of hatred, of pain. Laughing can blind us to feel as if everything is all right; it's an efficient bottle that can hide many hidden emotions and tears. It's an efficient mask.

But at the same time, being genuinely happy is also a way of showing strength; showing that it's possible to find light in darkness, showing that we're not afraid of smiling.

Perhaps a happy ending is impossible but we just have to make sure we can get as close as we can to a happy ending. After all, isn't that life?

"Hello y'all! Sorry for the wait!"

_**End**_

* * *

**Hello! Sorry I haven't updated for a while but… it's finally summer! Banzai! Anyhow, I came really close to deleting this story but then I decided to put up a final chapter. Thanks for reading and a SUPER BIG THANKS to everyone who reviewed! Happy Summer XD !!**


End file.
